


Convincing Disguises

by BerryBagel



Category: Captain Marvel (2019), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Drinking, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Multi, established relationships for everyone, everyone has a nice time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-12-18 16:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18254054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BerryBagel/pseuds/BerryBagel
Summary: Thor convinces himself that Carol is Loki in disguise.  Then befriends her anyways.





	Convincing Disguises

It is initially unclear how Fury knows the powerful woman.  They're old friends, Fury says. He worked with Carol back in the 90’s, apparently.  He says Carol is human. She walks like a human and talks like a human.

 

That story doesn't entirely check out, though, because Carol is not displaying characteristic human aging traits.  Thor wouldn't presume to guess her age, but she's certainly not upwards of five decades old. Unless Fury was working with an infant in the 1990’s, Carol is displaying some sort of decelerated aging.

 

And of course, most damning, the sheer power she can wield and control.  There's nothing human about that. Thor has spent the last week watching Carol absolutely  _ flatten _ children of Thanos.  They're lucky she arrived when she did.  She completely turned the tide of the fighting, and they never would've been able to undo the snap without her help.

 

Carol could likely outmatch even the strongest of the human avengers.  Her powers  _ have _ to be extraterrestrial.  Perhaps even... _ Asgardian _ ...in nature.

 

Thor is getting lunch with Bruce when the idea hits him.  He fumbles his sandwich.

 

“Carol...is Loki in disguise.” He says.

 

He can't believe he didn't think of it earlier.  Loki can't possibly really be dead, and isn't it convenient that an ally with godly power suddenly appeared right when they needed one most?

 

Bruce gives him a sympathetic look.  “Thor, no, Loki is gone. Carol is Carol.”

 

Bruce will come around.

 

* * *

Thor has obtained a pet lizard in recent weeks.  Captain Rogers has agreed to care for the lizard when Thor is off-planet.  As thanks, Thor has named the lizard in Captain Rogers’s honor.

 

Right now, Steve the lizard is sleeping on his heat rock, in his tank in Thor’s quarters of the Avengers compound.  The little guy is green, with black spots. Steve the lizard is a skink of some kind. Or maybe an iguana. Earth fauna is difficult.

 

Valkyrie does not like Steve the lizard.  Whenever she visits, she never turns her back on the little guy.  The tank was originally in the bedroom, but has since been relocated to the kitchen.  Some people just don't like reptiles, Thor figures. He can't understand, but he can accommodate.

 

“I was out with Carol last night.” Valkyrie says.  Valkyrie is sitting at Thor's breakfast bar, eating dry Cheerios.  She looks hungover. Valkyrie was out with Carol until three-forty AM.  Thor knows this because he was woken up at three-forty AM by Valkyrie collapsing into bed on top of him.  He's no light sleeper. She managed to land an elbow directly to his stomach.

 

“I think Carol is Loki in disguise.” Thor says.

 

Valkyrie doesn't immediately validate his claim with a  _ sure, that makes sense _ , or an  _ oh, that's why she tried to stab me last night _ .  In fact, she looks like she doesn't believe him.

 

Valkyrie looks at Steve the lizard, then looks back at Thor.  “Yeah?” She asks after a long pause. “You think  _ Carol _ is Loki?”

 

Thor isn't sure what to do with that inflection.  “Yes.”

 

Valkyrie looks at Steve the lizard again.  “Loki might very well be alive, and disguised as someone.  _ Or something _ .  But Carol is her own person.  Talk to her. You'll like her.”

 

* * *

Thor  _ does _ like Carol.  He likes her a lot.  Which is why he has to be so vigilant about this.  The second he lets his guard down, he can expect a mean-spirited surprise from his brother.

 

Carol likes karaoke.  That’s no shock, Loki loves karaoke.  But Carol doesn’t pick the same songs Loki usually does.  Carol hasn’t even glanced at the Brittany Spears selection available.  Carol goes for songs with strong basslines and then absolutely  _ screams _ along with them.  Thor can get behind that.  He doesn’t know most of the lyrics, but he can provide strong percussive backing vocals.

 

Valkyrie and Bruce aren’t big karaoke fans.  They’re sitting on the other side of the bar, avoiding eye contact.  Usually Thor has to drag one of them onstage with him, so this is...pretty nice, actually.

 

They follow up karaoke with shots.  Thor usually keeps a pretty tight reign on the Asgardian liquor.  Midgardians have a whole slew of rules about who can and can’t imbibe.  The last time he tried to let the spider-child have a drink he spent the next half hour getting lectured by Stark.  Carol isn’t Midgardian, really, so it’s probably fine for her to have some.

 

Carol and Thor end up back at the table with Valkyrie and Bruce.  Carol shows them pictures on her phone. The phone has a little cover that flips open and closed.  It’s fascinating technology.

 

“This is my wife.” Carol says.  They all lean in to see the one square inch of digital photo being proudly displayed.

 

Carol’s wife seems to be displaying normal Midgardian aging patterns.  That must be difficult for Carol, to see the person she loves most grow old.  Thor feels a similar pain. Sometimes he and Valkyrie have to avoid crunching the numbers on Earth lifespans when Bruce complains about backaches or gray hairs.

 

Thor tries not to think about that too much.  Something else might well kill him long before he really has to worry about outliving anyone.  And Carol seems very happy with her elderly human wife. They have a daughter and a cat. The daughter works on the Space Station.  The cat is currently under the care of Nick Fury.

 

Carol says she has to get going, and Thor wonders if he should offer to summon transportation for her.  There’s a way to do that directly from a phone, Bruce has shown him. He bets it would work on Carol’s flipping-front phone.  Then Carol  _ flies _ away, which is truly excellent.  Valkyrie and Bruce still let him summon a car because it’s a long walk from the bar back to the Avengers compound, and Midgardian technology is fun to use.

 

Thor wakes up in the middle of the night, still comfortably sandwiched between Bruce and Valkyrie, and considers the difficult ramifications of the fact that Carol is, undoubtedly, not Loki.

 

* * *

Valkyrie wants to meet Carol’s cat, Goose.  Carol says she’ll bring Goose around to visit sometime.  Valkyrie apparently likes cats but does not like Steve the lizard.  Thor does not understand. What are lizards, if not scaly cats?

 

“I like lizards.  I just don’t like _ that  _ lizard.” Valkyrie clarifies.  She gives Steve the lizard a look of undeserved suspicion.  What could a harmless reptile possibly be hiding?

 

* * *

Steve the lizard is actually Loki in disguise.  No one else seems as surprised by this reveal as Thor.

 

In Thor’s defense, Carol  _ also _ has a strange alien being disguised as a pet.

 

Carol watches from Thor’s kitchen table as Loki emerges from a terrarium and lunges at her cat with a knife.  She doesn’t even flinch as Goose’s face opens into a writhing mess of tentacles and slams Loki through the breakfast bar.  It’s the kind of unrestrained chaos that has been sorely lacking from his life since Loki “died”. Carol helps drag her kraken-cat out of the kitchen while Thor confiscates five knives from his brother.

 

Valkyrie was right.  Thor does like Carol.


End file.
